At the end of last year I took a step back from blogging because I needed a break from it. I was feeling really negative about the way it was heading, I was feeling crappy about the content and the overall look. I almost gave up. I had just totally fallen out of love with it. It’s easy to be in that position and forget why you ever even started blogging. The pressure of review deadlines and, with it now being a part of my income, the pressure to monetise and get picked up by brands. It just felt hectic and I felt stressed and like I wasn’t enjoying it.
Christmas couldn’t have come at a more opportune time really and I literally took it and ran with it. I wanted to make Christmas about relaxing, refreshing and reviving my love for the blog, but also to spend quality time with my family without feeling like I needed to be present on social media, so I kind of went on shut down. And wow did it do things for me. I felt like I could breathe again and I had time to plan where the blog would go.
One of the things I want to do is write a monthly gratitude journal. Nothing lengthy, but basically finding positives in my life that I could focus on, rather than the negative ones. I don’t know why but sometimes I can be so negative about things and I never look on the bright side. I can hear myself moaning over things I needn’t and getting stressed over things I can’t control.
Now, this isn’t going to start particularly well. January has been just a little bit of a crappy month for me on a ‘woman’s bodily function’ level, if you get my drift. It’s been ongoing since the 2nd January, something I’ve never experienced. It didn’t even go on this long post-partum and so I’ve been backwards and forwards to the doctors and well-woman clinic during the last month trying to figure out what the hell is going on. It’s made me snappy, hormonal and much more negative than I wanted to be at the start of the year. After all, it’s about me finding and focusing on the positives and snapping out of these negative funks. It’s been hard, but I think I’ve done it.
January has seen me be more consistent in my blogging and I’m so grateful to have found some linkies that I can stick with consistently to ensure I’m posting, at a minimum, those posts per week. If you’ve read one of my Little Loves posts you’ll remember I’ve said that I’m all about knowing my worth this year and really want to take the monetising side of things seriously, and not accept just any money that walks through the door. It has to be worth my time, otherwise it’s almost pointless. This also makes sure my blog is filled with much more organic content than sponsored and, in turn, I hope that will produce a bit more work.
I’m so happy that I’ve finally gotten round to updating my blog theme. It’s made me appreciate it a lot more and want to work on it a bit more. I had been searching for a theme for ages and had been toying with the idea of an illustrated and custom header but I’m actually happy with the way it looks at the moment. Maybe a little later this year I’ll invest in a ‘proper’ header but I do love the nice, clean look it has now.
In other, real life, stuff I’ve been able to focus on being less wasteful with our food and I think I’ve achieved that this month. By keeping tabs on what we have in the fridge and freezer and by making do with what’s in the cupboards, things are actually getting eaten and I’ve seen much less go in the bin! I’m so proud of myself for sitting down and making the time for this because it means we’re exploring new meals and trying to be resourceful rather than wasteful.
I have been, and continue to be, irrevocably grateful to the ‘solid six’ in my life. These six women and I have been in our own little Whatsapp bubble for quite a while now and it’s these six who I turn to when I need a moan (hey, it saves you lot having to read it), when I want to share something that’s going on or whether I just need a chat or some advice. They are there and I can not tell you how nice it is to have them. I love you girls!
Now, the title of this post actually came from a rant I was having to these girls about some particular people, and one of the girls just said ‘they’re adding fuel to your fire’ and I was like YES, yes they are! I am grateful that I now know, at the ripe old age of 27, when to shut my mouth. I can not be bothered to argue back with people, I can not be bothered to try and explain myself to people and why should I? I am a 27 year old woman, who is married with two children and a mortgage (though some people forget that). I don’t need to be spoken to like a child, nor do I want to be. I want to be treated like the adult that I am. So instead of fuelling an argument I am allowing their moans, digs and bitches to fuel my own fire. To make me work harder toward something I want, rather than something they want. I am so happy with my life right now and I can’t begin to explain how letting go of certain people, and their snide comments, makes me feel. It’s like I can breathe without being told I’m doing it the wrong way, or it’s not the way they expected me to do it. So here’s a big old handshake to you people because you are not bringing me down, you are helping me and I love you for that.
Most of all I am grateful for my husband and my little boys. Every single day. Without them I probably wouldn’t smile a lot!
Next month I’m going to write down one thing every day that I’m grateful for and you’ll be able to see it at the end of February! What do you have gratitude for this month? Do you ever take a step back and work out what it is you’re grateful for? Filling my life with positivity this year is key, are you doing the same?