Family | Preparing My Child For A Sibling

How do you prepare your child for a sibling? I guess it’s one of life’s many questions.

Since the birth of baby number two is coming around so quickly, I wanted to share with you some of the things we’ve been doing with Toby to try and help him prepare for his little brother’s arrival. It’s quite difficult as he’s only 19 months and doesn’t really understand what it means when we say there’s going to be another baby, although I’m pretty sure he knows something is happening – unless he thinks I’m just getting a bit fat!

We’ve actively been getting him to interact with my bump. We ask him things like, ‘where’s the baby?’, ‘what’s in Mummy’s belly?’ and ‘Toby, where’s Razor?’ (Razor is the name for the bump, not what we’re actually going to call him). If my belly is out we get him to feel it, but usually he’ll just pull his hand away and blow some raspberries and give it a little rub. There was one time that he actually gave my bump a hug, but it hasn’t happened since.

If we’ve been doing something for the new baby, we’ve been trying to involve him where we can. As we were setting up the cot today, even though he was slightly in the way, we let him pick up a few things so he felt like he was helping. He kept trying to put the screws in the holes, and you just got the feeling he wanted to feel useful. This was probably really good for him as the cot we were setting up was the one we’ve just moved him out of anyway; we’ve moved him to a cot bed so when the time comes for the sides to come off, it’s not another shift, plus he gets used to being in this one rather than his old one. I was really conscious that if we moved him into a bed, and the new baby into the cot all in one swoop, that he would feel like he was being replaced and pushed out.

Even though there are things absolutely everywhere, we do let him go into the nursery. It was previously the study and not a room where we could let him roam freely. However, since it’s been redecorated and the desk replaced with a cot, I’m happy to let him in there. If he wants to have a look around we tell him the room is for his little brother, and that this is where ‘Razor’ is going to sleep. I think by not restricting him, he won’t see it as new and exciting, and hope if ‘Razor’ is sleeping, he’ll stay out.

We finally got our gorgeous Mamas and Papas swing that we picked up at The Baby Show in February. We decided it’s probably best if we kept it out, since it has a few buttons on it that Toby will no doubt be fascinated with. The idea is that if we let him play with it while there are no batteries or baby in it, that it won’t be such a novelty when we come to use it. He initially swung it really hard so we explained that he has to do it softly and he’s been absolutely brilliant ever since. The second thing we did is strap in his lion teddy to simulate there being a baby. He’s quite happy to swing Leo and stroke his face really gently.

The one thing Toby really won’t do is sit and listen to a story. You get the very rare occasion that he will sit still and not try to ruin the book! I keep starting to read him stories that involve a new baby, but I don’t think we’ve managed to finish one yet. There are lots of lovely books out there, but we have the Usborne book of ‘First Experiences’ – I’d definitely recommend it. You need to find the duck on every page too!

We haven’t been able to spend lots of time doing really fun things together recently as Toby’s been poorly, and when he’s been feeling ok one of us are at work, or the weather is terrible! We’ve been trying to make the most of our time together though – whether it be having a cuddle while watching Paw Patrol, going to Farmer Fred’s in the morning, popping to the park or doing some drawing. Hopefully in these last few weeks we can get outside a bit more, and if not, I have some crafty ideas up my sleeve!

Toby is still in a highchair, but we do have a booster seat so he can sit at the table. Hopefully by the time ‘Razor’ is around 4-5 months old, Toby will be at the table all the time. We encourage him to sit at the table to play with his stacking cups, his stacking rings, doing drawings and occasionally having a meal – which he thinks is great!

The last thing is just generally speaking about him being a big brother! We ask him what he’s going to teach “Razor” when he’s here, and hope he can show him how to be a big boy!

Is there anything you think I’m missing? What did you do to prepare your child/children for a sibling? Did you seen when Toby revealed that he was going to be getting a little brother?